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Monday, February 15, 2010 Blurps 1:00 AM
Hell-O. It's 1am in the morn, and i can't sleep. Just hung up the phone with Dearie, he was tired. So i got up, too bored to sleep and decided to blog. Besides today i'd been at sis crib, and then off back home. Bought dinner to home, on the lappy and watched tv. Guess that's gonna be the same ol' thingg gonna happen during CNY. *sigh* Yes i'm bored. I have to put aside that i used to 'not sit at home kinda type' for now. Cause when this very boredom day on any public or one-mth holidays, it's just gonna kill me anytime. My mood, i mean. I want Dearie, no. I need him. I don't want my mind to put as when i couldn't meet him, i need my friends. But sometimes i do, but for now i prefer girlfriends. Argh dammit! Thanks to me mixing with boys more than girls. So much for me being a tomboy last time tt now i got a less girlfriends. I don't want him to feel insecured so i decided to change my way of friends. I don't want to be the old me, calling up the guys, smoking, playing guitar, thonning, soccer, to changi/och/exploring, whistling at the girls?!?!.....etc. Hahh yeah pfft hurhurhurrrrrr~ Just why couldn't i call up the girls instead?! Or maybe i found them bitchy before? Oh goshh. Whereas i'm turning more feminine now and even bitch abt ppl! Ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaa~ (either with gfs or Baby) Geez, idk why lah when there's an opportunity or holidays, i justt feel like there must always be a plan for me. Anything ahh as long as it clears my boredom. And what's bothering me abt it is because i don't really sit at home last time. Well abt tt, i couldn't care much cause i have Dearie now. Just that, when we couldn't meet up then i got moody and went off. And then trying to seek a plan just to clear my boredom. Sometimes i'm curious with my boyfriend y'know. He hasn't had any jobs for the past 2 months, and all he did was watch the tv, sleeping, play guitar, or chat with me otp. But sometimes lepak with his friends, but not as often as those guys always lepak bwh blk. DAH! I mean, how exactly he did it, i wonder. Bt for me, i got fussy when a plan gt stucked up and then need smtg to cover up. I'm just impressed with him that he's unlike any other guy, he's unlike my guyfriends who just couldn't sit at home. I felt kinda ashamed of myself cause it feels like terbalekk gitu. Hahah, but i really need to work things out esp abt this. I have to work this out myself. Well, Dearie still never fail to encourage me from time to time. To be there for me when he could. Cause obviously we lived so far away. So either otp or texting is the only solution for us to communicate. At leastt i am not Lonely after all. *eyebrows naek-naek* HAHA. Gahh, i really have to admit that i feel silly now. At first i felt like no mood to sleep cause was too bored. Bt after typing my feelings out, i felt better though. HAH. |
